Believing lies about reality leads to unhappiness. When your map of reality matches the reality itself, you tend to be happier because your expectations of the world around you are accurate. You are seldom disappointed. It's difficult for you to be defeated, to feel depressed or discouraged. Because you see things as they really are.
So how do you know when you are believing a lie?
Here are three clues to look for in your own behavior, speech patterns, or attitudes that may indicate your believing some sort of lie about the way things really are. Anything you say, feel, or do that seems to…
- shame
- blame
- justify
…might indicate that you are believing, and even defending a lie about how things really are.
When faced with any problem, or uncomfortable situation, watch your language. Do you say things that are intended to bring shame to another person, or even yourself? Do you try to assign blame for the way things are, to another person or even to yourself? Or do you work to justify the wrong actions of another person, or even yourself?
If so, it may be time to examine your premise. There's a good chance that something you currently believe about reality is inaccurate.
The accurate view of reality will always lead you to recognize, in the words of my friend Armand Morin, “It is what it is”. No shaming, blaming, or justifying required.